Archive for the ‘Vincent G. Hardy, Jr’ Category

Do you really want to know? I mean really want to know what the status of the average black family in America is? If you do, I’m not 100% sure I can give you the answer. What I can do is offer you my hypotheses. I’m not a certified expert appointed by a bunch of intellects, who have sprawling curriculum vitas and impressive framed parchments emblazoned with shiny stickers and big signatures. No, I’m just a young professional who lives in a black family, who has friends in black families, and witnesses the struggle on a daily. Hopefully that will be enough background to make my observations minutely credible. You on board? You are? Cool, let us begin!

The problem that I’m seeing with the black family is often times just a lack there of… What happened to the nuclear family that we learned about in elementary school? You know the one; with a loving couple (typically married) and their children. Am I the only one who faintly remembers this lesson? Maybe that’s the issue! Having a strong sense of family in the traditional sense (2 parents living together raising their children) is a fleeting concept, not only in black homes but in homes everywhere. There has been a steady decline in the number of people doing what Grandpa and Grandma did. Meet, courtship, engagement, marriage, co-habitation, then children. Now think about the steps most of our peers take to get to the children part… The differences are so drastically different it’s not even worth trying to loosely list them.

I really do believe that this is the disconnect. We’re so wrapped up in instant gratification that our generation really struggles with the concept of patience, including myself. Taking the time to learn who this person is that you want to be with, for the sake of looking for a formidable mate, rather than just a good time is the key. There are way too many innocent children walking around (potentially including myself and a good number of my peers) that are products of a good time. I’m going to plant this seed in your thought box real quick: When one learns that they are with child, if that pregnancy was not the goal of their relationship, the initial reaction is pretty far from joyous. When they get the news the first thing they think about is: “What are/am we/I going to do?”….

What I’m getting at is that unplanned pregnancies have to be warmed up to, and learned to be loved by the parents, versus loving this blessing before it’s a reality. There is the “Oh shit” phase, hopefully VERY quickly followed by celebrations! Let’s do our best to make better decisions when a life is potentially hanging in the balance. Children don’t ask to be here, so let’s make sure when they get here it’s because you wanted them to come. They deserve that at the very least.



Frolic across the tear laden tissue skewed haphazardly about the desires of her heart I try not.

Far from being a man is the one who cares not for her feelings but only for that feeling he gets when they’re feeling…

Too much to loose she has when she lets him savor her sweet nectar… but she lets him because she thinks she has to.

Afraid of being alone she gives him her treasure, hoping and praying, convincing herself that this will keep him, this time it’s different, he is different, this time is the last time.

Sorry, but this time is now “last time” cuz the next time you’ll be thinking of the last time hoping that that time won’t lead to another next time looking at last time…

Another notch on your belt has been etched by the acid of another passionless romance. Who’s to blame?

You know it’s not too often that one is afforded the opportunity such as mine. I recently finished my degree and joined the masses of the unemployed for a short period of time. We all know the current state of our economy isn’t the greatest but it is on a long road to recovery. Opportunities for employment are bleak. So much so that it can be pretty discouraging when looking for a job. A lot of my contemporaries are currently experiencing the bite of this economy and opting to go back to school. The last thing I want to do right now is go back to school. I value the privilege of education and plan to go back but I need some time first.

This whole school thing really strikes a nerve with me. I hate it when people adopt this attitude like something is due to them because they went and got a college degree. What makes them think that type of outlook is acceptable…… I’ll tell you.

So many of us have been brainwashed to subscribe to this cookie cutter process of success. In my OPINION (that is what this blog is all about) following or trying to recreate the process or experience that others have had is probably the quickest way to limit yourself. America is one of the few places where different is often times more successful than safe, tried, proven, or expected. We (anyone looking to make a mark on society) can’t be afraid to be the one people talk about. There is nothing wrong with being different or choosing to find success by your own methods. I find it funny that people are so quick to talk about how society celebrates individualism and that being different is cool and encouraged…. That is a damn lie! People who are different are almost always ridiculed by their peers for doing whatever it is that they do. We’re so quick to judge!

What would our world be like if we encouraged people to think outside the realm of what “society…” has decided is normal? I’ll tell you what it’d be like. IT WOULD BE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL F*#%!^$ PLACE THAT ANYONE COULD EVER BEGIN TO DREAM OF. A true living fairy tail. Fairy tails in my opinion are only exaggerated ideas of a reality that people wish they could exist in. If you go through and remove all the magic and fairies from your favorite imaginary place you’ll find that it would be a pretty awesome place to live LoL!! A place where love and truth is always the answer and evil only exists in small isolated instances that are always triumphed by the righteous! …… keep imagining lol!!

(Jump Man = Dead Man) Is Jordan socially irresponsible?

I am having the hardest time understanding the logic, or rather the lack there of; when I start to think about the violence committed over a pair of shoes. What the hell is wrong with these people? Granted, lets take into account that I am in no way a viable source of information when it comes to the dynamics of the world in which a Sneaker Head exists. But any sensible human being should be able to discern the true level of ridiculousness surrounding this product!!

I refuse to try to wrap my head around peoples’ excitement for any newly released product because Apple, Inc. has successfully built a cult and I am about 2 products from becoming a full fledged member! My point of inquiry in this whole sneaker thing is: “Where does Michael Jordan stand on this issue?” How does it feel to put your name on a product that people are killing and starting riots over?

This beast of a consumer that seeks the newly released shoe, (that is only released once a year in a limited supply, almost asking for problems with that whole supply and demand thing we all study) is hell bent on getting what they want. I honestly believe that my lack of understanding stems from an equal lack of interest.

But when we bring up the the topic of social responsibility the definition really depends upon how someone feel about it. Everyone is going to have an opinion, and this is fine, this blog encourages it LoL!! As a public figure, role model to the masses and an icon in every sense of the word I believe MJ has a responsibility to actively speak out about the violence that this product has brought about. Those who are as influential as he know the power a few of their words can have. So open your mouth! If President Obama released a line of dress socks and there were riots and muggins at Brooks Brothers and Jos. A Bank stores don’t you think people would want him to say something about it….?

Any way it’s just a thought. I can assure you that I wont be breaking my neck for a pair of sneakers….. EVER! But to those who do I wish you the best of luck in your dangerous plight to acquire this shoe you treasure so dearly. In the mean time I’ll stick to the Nike products that work well for me: Cole Haan, nike running shoes and flip flops lol.

Safe Shopping Sneaker Heads!!


Sitting static in a pond without ripples is the imagination of those without a yearning for an understanding of all things implied.

If not on their island where the dimensions are explicit and there exists no unknown they find themselves baffled, confused and uncomfortable.

This is an ode to the explorer’s spirit.  Charting the rough waters in the sea of individualism.  Building bridges to unknown land connecting curiosity with reality making a marriage of infinite possibilities.

Threading the massive vessel of determination through the narrow canal of unfair barriers and un-subscribed limitations.  We are a people who inhabit the uninhabitable; not by choice but rather by force, yet we still thrive.  You will not write us off!

I compose the score to which my life dances to.  The high notes in the last movement will bring a close to my life’s work.  Tending to the beacon in the lighthouse on the dark waters edge will be me protecting my legacy.

Think about it for a second in terms of things that attract the opposite sex.  Is an individual really more attracted to someone who is older or are they attracted to what one associates with age?  Things such as experience and financial stability and values.  Also are the demands that much different when it comes to the sexes?  Are the qualities that men and women look for in a partner who is their senior the same?

I would have to say what attracts men to older women is generally different from that of the qualities that spark the interest in younger women toward older men.  Over the years I’ve heard some argue that those women who are attracted to older men usually lacked that designated father figure in their lives.  Though this claim makes sense it honestly creeps me out lol.  So what attracted you to this older guy are things that subconsciously satisfy your yearning for a father figure…  I mean I get it but it just doesn’t sit well with me.  But what it also sheds light on is how women’s selection process often times have a deeper conviction then that of men.

I can say with confidence that the attraction toward older women for the majority of men is anchored in their sexual appetite and the curiosity of what a seasoned woman can teach them.  Let’s face the facts, when women are gearing up toward the age where their sexual appetite is peaking… unfortunately men are knocking at the beginning of the end lol.  So it only makes sense that older women are attracted to younger men who are in their sexual prime.  Thank goodness for the little blue pill for the male AARP card holder lol!!  An older woman is more likely to take care of her young play thing.  Spend more time catering to his needs.  This comes to her naturally at this stage in her life as women are just wired to be a nurturer, couple that with the man being younger than she is it just works…

So with that being said… I guess men and women are attracted to older partners for similar reasons.  I know that I don’t discriminate LoL.  I love all women and believe that real love know no limits.  Though I’m not readily attracted to women who are more than 7 years my senior at my ripe young age of 23.  At the end of the day human sexuality is just one big ass complicated ball of confusion LoL.  Just do what makes you happy and care less what people think about it!

This Poem was written to honor the memory of my fraternity brother’s mother.  It was recited at her memorial service.  By far one of the most important things I’ve ever written.


With the help of the divine she gave me the gift of life.  My first cold harsh breath, resulting in a shrill loud cry was as sweet a note as any to her ears.  Squirming, loud, red, and wrinkled; yet she was the first to say he’s perfect.

We all know that this day will come. Laying the first woman you ever loved to rest is never easy, is he wrong to be selfish? To want her for one more second, one more warm meal, one more I love you, one more hug and kiss.  Her smiling face floats in the mists of his memories where she’ll live forever. Here is where she’ll never leave him.

Branded is the soul with the love of a mother. An eternal flame, flickering like any other, grows and diminishes with time, but never will it be extinguished. Its warmth can be called on when we’re at are lowest and its light shines when we’re at our darkest.

Only in true love do needs and wants coincide.  The only entity capable of occupying two places simultaneously yet in each domain it’s the remedy to a different pain.  And it is because of she who loved first that we’re able to love at all.